1. Spike is not having his best day ever.

2. It's written in the present progressive tense. Nobody knows why.

3. Will it ever be finished? Who the hell knows?

4. When is the next chapter coming? (See #3)

5. Plot Without Porn... a winning formula that appeals to .1% of the fandom. Alas. Nobody gets laid until the author gets laid. Therefore nobody gets laid. Or if they do, it's not what anybody hoped for. Mwah-hah-hah-hah-hah.

6. All the characters need anti-depressants, a teddy bear and a hug. They will get none of these things.

7. Slang and cussing and words that don't really exist and "dialoge verite," oh my! Also, somebody usually exclaims, "Dammit, Spike!" at least once.

8. Lots of blood and pain and very descriptive suffering and blood. Or lots of Harmony for some strange reason.

9. Happy ending? What's that?

10. Ellipses, ellipses, ellipses! And a hearty dash of dashes.